My 8-month old is NOT sleeping at night. He is regressing. The number of times he is waking up each night is increasing. This is not how it's supposed to go.
Therefore, I am regressing. The number of times I am waking up each night is increasing. Not exactly my favorite time of day to be awake.
I recently realized I have been having some emotional moments in which the reasons for reach beyond the scope of exhaustion. What I'm saying is, I think I need more than a good nights sleep to snap me out of this funk. I need to step back, look around, and reevaluate my days. I need a little more organization and structure and a little less diaper changing.
My father-in-law recently told me "Believe it or not, you'll look back on this time as the 'good ol' days'". I know he's right. There will come a time when Emma is 14 and the dress she is trying to wear is too short. I'll look back on this picture when she was FOUR and dressed herself in not one, but two dresses, two leg warmers, two Hello Kitty socks, and two Minnie Mouse jellie shoes.
The good ol' days.
Yesterday I had a list a mile long with what I wanted to get done. Pick up the playroom, make the kids beds (why, I don't know), vacumm up the obscene amount of dog fur, make my own bed (more on this later), and mop the kitchen. Nothing on this list is that outlandish. Nothing on this list seems that difficult. But let me tell you- I got ONE thing done. The dog fur.
But you know what I DID do? I threw dinner in the crockpot. I played outside. With the kids. For a looong time. It was a perfect fall day with the sun shining and green grass swaying.
Little guy loved it.
Yesterday was a step in the right direction. I chose play time over cleaning time. And while it stressed me out to come back in to a kitchen that wasn't mopped, my happiness trumped the stress. I'm not saying I'm going to let my house sit dirty, but I am saying I'm going to make a bigger effort to choose sunny days over flourescent kitchen lights.
I have read a few posts lately that have make me realize I am not alone in this world of mothering little ones. We are not alone. We have each other. And most of all, we have little munchkins that bring us more happiness than should be allowed. (Even if it is sandwiched between poopy diapers and telling them to stop jumping on the bed for the 385th time).
Absorb today. Take it in. These really are the good ol' days.