feeling it.

I've been really feeling fall lately.

It's been unseasonably hot here in good ol' Indiana.  We have record low amounts of rain for the month of July.  We mowed our grass ONCE this month.  We have been staying in instead of going to the pool.  The thought of packing up everything we need and trekking to and from the heat-stroke heated car sounds exhausting - and hot.

So lately I've been thinking about all the fun fall things I look forward to every year.  It's especially fun because Emma is at an age where she really understands carving the pumpkins, costumes, and santa & the elves making toys.

It's not to say I can't wait for fall to get here, I just won't be disappointed when it arrives.  I'll be getting bigger and bigger which means I can wear stretchy pants and football jerseys on the weekends.  (Nice visual, eh?)  And even though I can't drink any beer, I sure can eat another bowl of chili wtih extra cheese because I'm eating for two.  (Yes, I'm going to use that as much as I can, as this should be my last pregnancy and I'll never be able to eat like this again.)

Emma's already excited about looking at halloween costumes.  I think she wants to be a princess.  Doesn't every girl try that out for at least one costume growing up?  She likes the one that costs $45.  I am going to to my best to make one for $5.

And right around the corner, before the fall weather hits, is my brother's wedding.  It's the first weekend in September and plans are coming right along.  Emma is a flower girl and is very excited.  My project this week is to scour Etsy and find the perfect hair accessory for her outfit.  I want her to feel like the prettiest girl in the world that day.  This might be a memory she has forever and I want it to be a good one.  The whole weekend should be a blast.  We're staying in our first hotel as a family of 4.  We all have spiffy new outfits to wear.  And I'm going to make sure there are lots of pictures taken.

As for now, I'm finally getting some energy back and it feels good.  Cleaning has resumed at about 50%, and I feel less stressed about it all.

My garden has exploded with tomatoes and so I'm off to make my first-ever batch of homemade salsa.

Taco pizza anyone?

I think....no wait, I KNOW.

I'm ready for this to be my last pregnancy.

Don't get me wrong.  I'm not miserable.  I don't hate it.  I'm just ready to feel like myself again.

It's like I got a sneak preview of my life with multiple kids when Dean was born.  But I was so damn emotional that I didn't appreciate it like I should have.  I guess it was my lesson in life.

I also was only NOT pregnant for 9 months.  (We got a positive when Dean was 10 months.)  I didn't even put my maternity clothes away.  Bottles are just staying in the cabinet for #3 to come around and use them in SIX MONTHS.  <---whah?  no way.

I was telling David last night I just want to wake up and have some energy.  I want to wake up and drink my coffeeeeee.  Oh, I miss my coffee.  I want my house to be clean.  I want to go grocery shopping.  Like, big time grocery shopping.  I know it may sound weird, but I love when my cart is full of healthy snacks for the kids, organic fruits & veggies, and ingredients for a new recipe I'm going to cook that night.  I love cooking a meal that I know is David's favorite.  I love when Emma says she is "hungee" for a snack, and I have one for her.  It sounds simple, I know.  But lately it's been more of a stress to find any food in this house, and the LAST thing I want to go do is grocery shop for food that won't sound good to me.  This baby is a picky one.  The pickiest yet actually.  I usually find something I want at the store, bring it home, and let it go bad in the fridge because I (baby) decided we didn't want it.  I bet we have eaten out more times in the last 3 months than the last year combined.  It's not great for our finances either.

I want to go running and feel sweat down my back.  I want to breathe hard and lift some heavy weights.  I want to feel stronger and healthier.  I want to put on my running clothes and just go, jam to music, and de-stress by myself for a short while.

I know this list is filled with wants, wants, and more wants.  But it's my blog and I can want if I want to.  (See what I did there?)

I am making a conscious effort to really ENJOY this pregnancy.  I am becoming more aware that this will be my last and I am at peace with it.  I am ready to move past the baby stage of life and get this toddler-show on the road.  :)

It's what I got.

Hello?

Is any one still there?

I fear I may have lost you.  I've been gone a while.  But for good reason.

I've been really tired.

And hungry.

And nauseous.

And pregnant.

Yep.  I'll give you a second to take that in.

Baby #3 is on the way.

And it is wiping me out.

Being pregnant the first time with Emma, I had all the same symptoms, but no other babies to take care of.  Therefore, I could take a nap when I wanted, eat when I wanted, and ignoring the laundry only affected me.

When I was pregnant with Dean, I was living with my in-laws.  I didn't have to take care of the entire house, did much less grocery shopping, and had tons of help.

But now.  Oh, now.  I have my own house I'm responsible for which is becoming increasingly difficult to maintain because of my "I'd rather be napping" attitude.  I do the grocery shopping with 2 muchkins in tow, which on average, take about 1 hour more than it should.  And finding something to keep them busy is easy in the summer, but it wears me out pretty quickly.  I'm pretty sure I'm going to regret complaining about the hard summer I've had when I'm trapped inside the house this winter with two rowdy kids and a newborn.

Here's the deets:

Due Date: January 11th, 2012

How far along: 13 weeks today

Weight Gain: As of last appt (6/22), I had lost 1/2 a pound. (thank you morning sickness)

Maternity Clothes: Yes.  Everything yes.

Feeling baby:  Yes!  I have felt a definite kick two days in a row.  :)

Food Cravings:  Not so much cravings as aversions.  No garlic.  Ever.  Eck.

Gender:  We won't know until the baby is born!  Surprise!

What I miss:  Drinking in the summertime.  (Didn't I say that last year?)

What I love:  Baby kicks.  They never get old.

Looking forward to:  Finding out what the gender is.

Milestone:  Getting over the morning/noon/night sickness.  Thank goodness.

I certainly did not expect to be pregnant so soon, but what a blessing. 

And, now since I don't feel like yakking on my keyboard anymore, I should be updating more often.

Thanks for listening.